The Lighthouse In the Sea of Our Wants: Priorities

What are they and how can we make them?

Sep 03, 2024

Art by Felicia Chiao, love her work!

Take a minute and imagine.

Your suspended in a black, blank, comforting void. All around you your different interests and dreams begin to appear.

They materialize in a variety of bright loud colors—all vying for your attention. Cramped in a crowded loud space, which one do you reach for? What goal do you choose?

Side note, the dream I chose was to be a teacher. In this life, I’d rather be entrenched in my community than anything else.

“I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another fig was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantin and Socrates and Attila and a pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn't quite make out. I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn't make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet.” - Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

Oh my gosh, this is chef’s kiss—michelin star prose. I LOVE this short story.

Wants, wants are unlimited. We can and do have as many as our hearts desire. But we don’t have the resources to sustain them. So how do we choose? How can we choose one and forsake all the others?

Priorities, the first goals to walk on the airplane, the primary concern. This dream will take precedence over the others. So, the dream you want to achieve first.

Why we need priorities is literally the same as basic economic theory—haha😂

Art by Rain Szeto

The Lighthouse in a Sea of Want: Priorities.

Priorities act as a bright saving angel when we’re paralyzed by our daily commitments and dreams. We all get overwhelmed by our every day needs, wants, and to do list sometimes. I’ve cried over it, you’ve cried over it—it’s a common problem. Priorities give you a path through that overwhelming jungle.

Priorities reduce stress.

Your desk is covered in papers, bills, trash, and to do lists. It ignites your nerves and you aren’t sure where to start. Then, someone runs in and brushes all the stuff off your desk leaving a single post-it note. That’s priorities. It reduces your check list to one thing. They’re the real-life “do one thing at time”.

Priorities save you time.

Spending less time thinking about what you’re going to do and more time doing those things saves you a few hours. If you finish tasks during a scheduled time to do them, then you give yourself time to relax, work on hobbies, and spend time with friends.

Priorities dodge procrastination.

When you make a decision on what you need to do, when you prioritize, you don’t leave room for the procrastination monkey. Distractions and avoidance become obsolete when you have your single mission to work towards.

So, How Do You Do It?

“Lack of time is actually a lack of priorities” - Tim Ferris

Alright! Let’s get crackin’! Go ahead and grab a piece of paper or open a doc.

There’s two ways you can approach this.

Aspirational Priorities — Write down your dreams for the next ten years. Where do you want to be? What do you want to be doing? Are there any skills or hobbies you want to be better at?
Everyday Priorities — Write down the commitments you have for the next week. Your work/school assignments, projects you want to finish, that annoying chore list.

Now you have a list of what’s important to you for this week. Now we gotta choose what’s the most important.

You can either do this based on your own opinions, but if you need a little assist, here’s what I use to measure my priorities:

Low Cost → High Value
High Cost → High Value
Low Cost → Low Value
High Cost → Low Value

This little table is asking what will cost you the least and what you’ll benefit the most from. In that order from most beneficial to least is what your list of priorities should mirror.

Take a few minutes to go through that for yourself.

Time’s Up!

Now-last step I promise- take some time to find where you are going to achieve these priorities.

To be able to achieve your priorities you need to give yourself time to do them. Using your calendar, planner, or this resource from neal.fun, measure the amount of time you have to dedicate to your priorities every day.

If you don’t have a lot of time, consider moving around any extra commitments you have if possible.

For Aspiring Priorities - Take extra time to create sustainable goals to eventually meet your long-term aspirations. Then use the day measure resource.

The Priority Disclaimer

Following your priorities isn’t going to be easy at first. You’re not going to be perfect. You’re not going to achieve every single priority every day. Life happens. Forgive yourself, reflect, and move forward.

You failed yesterday, fail better tomorrow.

One step at a time, you’ll make it. Don’t doubt yourself.

The Readerly Round-Up: What Did You Just Read?

Priorities are dreams, goals, to dos that take precedence over all the others. Making priorities reduce stress, the itch to procrastinate, and saves time in your day.

Create priorities by writing a list of your goals/to dos and ranking them by how beneficial they are to you. Then, make time for each priority in your calendar/planner.

Resources to Learn More

Want to learn more about how you use your time everyday? Try this Time-Life Self Assessment. I did it the other day and it gives you a lot of insight on how you make use of your time.
Check out Prioritize This by Lily Silverton. She highlights how you can clear out the fog of what life throws at you and find a direction that empowers you.
Want to learn more effective ways to create and execute on priorities? First Thing’s First by Stephen Covey is one of the best to read!